Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Guest Post Numero Uno: Ed from Ed's Funny Pages!

Ladies and gents, I give you the man that needs no introduction, ED!

After you read, you better go to his blog and check out his hilarity. Click on this sentence. 

Here his is!


First!
Ha!
Usually that’s what people do in the comment section, but since I’m the first guest poster in this new series of guest posters on Travis’ blog, that means I WIN!
Sadly, all the other posters will be TRYING to follow me……”The Original”, which is somewhat like “The Situation”, only less orange-y …….and disease-freer.
(That last part was for you, Tamara! Stop blaming me for your drip! The rash maybe, but not the drip.)
I’m Ed.
I’ve been a follower of Travis’ since he had only about 16.
Back then, (before he sold out to The Man) he was like a poor man’s version of Larry The Cableguy.
You know, before Nutrisystem……………When Larry was still fat and funny.
Yes, the good old days.
That’s when our Bromance was still new.
I would read his blog, he would read mine.
We would trade comments.
Occassionally, we would g-chat.
Maybe even a phone call or two.
And of course, we exchanged tons of nudie pics or ourselves.
But not anymore! Oh no.
Now, he’s all busy with his NEW “friends”………..You all.
Kicked me to the curb faster than Samantha did Lindsey.
There was a time, before the Man-ymoon ended, that we planned our World Domination together.
We even had ideas for a secret commune compound of funny bloggers, from which we would rule the comedic world.
Then he hit 200 followers, and I was left in the dust while he chased his dreams at the video store.
So now, our Man-love is one-sided.
While he’s off with his legion of fans and Blackberry bitches, I’m now the proverbial fat kid waiting to get picked for kickball.
“Pick me, pick me! PLEASE! Pick me!”
Hell, even my own wife and kids love Travis more than they do me. L

Seriously though, I have no idea what I’m supposed to do with this guest post.
The last time I appeared on Travis’ blog, other than in the comment section, was for his 100th Post Roast.
And since I spent the whole time saying mean things about him and the other roasters, I figured I should be nice this time.
It’s just like momma always said, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all!”
And so……………

25 comments:

  1. I have the "Guy Love" song from "Scrubs" playing in my head now.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ed you are loved
    Travis show Ed the love.

    WE ARE NOT BITCHES!
    Take that back Ed or I will make sure your wife super glues your penis to your asshole!

    ReplyDelete
  3. @June: How do you know she didn't already? Hmmmmmmmm?

    Boy, that ED is a funny dude.

    He makes my man biscuit moist.

    If he wasn't married, I would take him out for some hookers.

    I plan to send him lots of money and encourage others to do likewise.

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  4. roflmbo well I will tell ya I am a bithc ain't got no shame in my game.. a KY briar patch bitch at that and that makes it even worse... but I like ya Ed ... Trust me when I say I am this faithful to more then Travis.. ya know he ain't the only one I shower my attention on lol

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  5. I love the Man-ymoon word. And you were very nice to Travis. Hopefully some of his followers will become your followers too. After all, Travis did command and his followers do obey. Like Stepford Wives.

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  6. Ohhh could you imagine your penis glued to your asshole...(shudder@June's comment) LOL

    I'm a bitch. I'll admit it. And how's come Ed hasn't been over to my place to guest post. HUH???? Is it a man thing? Do you have to have a penis and dingleberries to play?????

    Neither one of you have been over to say hey to me, maybe I'll boycot...maybe...

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  7. aww, poor Ed. Maybe he should just go eat worms.

    And did you really just say 'makes my manbiscuit moist?'

    I just barfed in my mouth a little bit.

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  8. i'm sorry. i'm one of his "new friends." and we're more popular than you are. you can't sit with us. and you know what? he never even talks about you. OLD NEWS, man.

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  9. Hahaha Its Guy love, don't compromise!!

    I love this. I'm so sad that he doesn't love you anymore, but I'm pumped your sticking to your Niceness this week.

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  10. Ahhhh....Ed....not everyone can hang with the boys....

    Not everyone has brass balls in her purse and makes talk of teabaggin....

    Great Guest Post. You're welcome in my pond anytime.

    Bromance *snort*

    ReplyDelete
  11. I remember the good ol' days. Before Travy went big time. He used to be on gchat all the time. He was always talking about his MannyMoon with Ed.

    Then something happened and I got an invite to BB Chat. From Travis. And Ed didn't get one.

    Then there was jealousy and rage. Ed said some nasty things. Travy had to tell him we were moving on. Either upgrade or be left behind.

    Ed didn't upgrade. He was left behind.

    Bitter....you wear it well my friend!

    Kidding...totally kidding!

    Great post dude!

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  12. All of a sudden I'm compelled to go read Ed's blog. It's like there is this force pulling me there. I think it might be that part of me that is a people pleaser.

    Ed. You're a funny dude. But I would never fully abandon Travis just for you. You'll have to share all us "bitches".

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  13. Yup, now I'm scared to guest post.

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  14. Mannymoon! Love that!

    I miss Travis and am dying for some Tyra scoop.

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  15. Maybe your wife needs to buy you a Blackberry so you can play with the cool kids.

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  16. Ed, remember what "they" say about social climbers on the way up. They may step on you on the climb to the top, but will look down, point and say, “BWAHAHAHAHAHA”. Sorry dude! You been screwed and didn’t even get a kiss.

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  17. Man, i had better sit down and start drafting my guest post now if that is the caliber of guest blog I have to follow. Thank god I have a degree in writing. Those 6 years I spent earning it are finally going to be put to good use.

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  18. Sorry about stealing Travis away from you Ed. But you two were growing apart and you were just holding him back. I'm sure you understand. Plus we have that "New Friend Smell." Compare that to yours and you know how easy it was for Travis to switch.

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  19. I am pretty sure Tgoette just called TravyG a switch hitter! Bwahahaha!

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  20. Ed I pick YOU to be on my most awesomest kick ass FU man kick ball team!

    Travis with all his high falutin tech stuff...

    Did I spell fautin right?

    ReplyDelete
  21. Oh and PS

    Im pretty sure that technically speaking I was the # 1 guest blogger but I'm not gonna rub it in...

    That I was #1

    Me

    Yea

    ReplyDelete
  22. Wait. There are TWO, FAT FUNNY men blogging? Shit. I better go follow. See ya.

    ReplyDelete
  23. lovely, i just added many new emo backgrounds 4 my blog
    http://www.emo-backgrounds.info

    ReplyDelete
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