Monday, March 29, 2010

Memoir Monday: High School Travis Gets His Kiss On.

(Hey y'all. This little thing is called Memoir Monday, and I'd be thrilled if you gave it a shot. Just jot down a story about yourself, grab my code down there, and I'll link you up to be read by all my wonderful blog buddies. The only rule? It has to be true. I am personally doing what I can to help cure your case of the Mondays. Thanks for playing along!)

Some of you may be shocked to hear this, but I was not really a popular guy in high school. If you had to class me, I'd probably have landed squarely in the middle, as so demonstrated by this senior class picture. 

What's that ladies? A close up? Well hell yeah I can do a close up. 

Ring on, arm on the knee, gut sucked in, that's the pose. Don't hate. I was way cooler than you, and I dated your wife. She totally made out with me. 

However, while I didn't fit in any one clique, I was pretty much friends with everyone. I could wander from group to group, having something to say to everyone, and making every person laugh. 

I was also a basketball player.

Flaming balls. Yeah. I was WAY cooler than you.

I was legit, son. I scored almost a thousand points in two seasons, and I was MVP my junior and senior year. I could take pictures of all my various accolades and achievements, but trust me; the blog doesn't have room.  

"The greatest thing about me is my humility." -Will Smith. (& Travis Sloat)

All basketball players have to practice. At least the good ones do. If you're Kentucky, you can play ball on sheer talent without working hard, but you see where that gets you, under 50% from the free throw line and a humiliating bus ride back to NBA draft after West Virginia makes shooting 3 pointers look as easy as dunking on a kid goal. 

Anysuck, back to my practicing. 

It was a light practice day, and I had decided to try my luck behind the 3 point line before the bell rang. I only made three or four from behind the arc during my illustrious high school career, and those were pretty much all luck. 

In walked Kara. Kara was a breathtaking young thing that I had a typing class with. The typing class I took that had nothing but freshman girls in it. The typing class that was the best class I ever took.  

So Kara walks into the gym, and on a whim I shout out, "Hey! If I make this, can I get a kiss on the cheek?" 

"Oh Travis, you're so funny... Yeah..."

I shanked it. She walked off, and I tried again the next day. I kept trying until I made it. Then I got my kiss on the cheek, and it was glorious. This of course made me shoot the long ball with wild abandon anytime she was in the gym. 

One day I got brave. I asked her for our usual deal, then I insisted that she wait until I made it. I made the shot, and she moved in for the kiss. 

As she did, I quickly turned my head so that my lips were facing hers dead on. 

As she pressed her lips to mine, time stopped. It was a magical moment. I was kissing Kara, the cutest freshman there was. I'm pretty sure a rainbow sprouted up, and no telling what else sprouted as well. Butterflies flew by. A light breeze came up...


The rainbow went away, and so did any other condition caused by the glorious moment. Turns out the light breeze was stirred up by her hand heading towards my face. My ear was ringing and the whole side of my face was numb. She slapped me so hard I actually think I went blind in one eye for a few minutes. Out of the two times I was slapped in high school, it was definitely the worst. 

Was it worth it? 

Hell yes it was worth it. That was the single greatest three point shot I ever hit. 

P.S. I saw you in Mazzio's the other day, and it made me think of this story. If you ever read this, I just want to say that I'll never apologize for it. I hope it was as good for you as it was for me!

Other Non-Slapped 3 Point Shots At Life This Week: (GO READ THEM!)


  1. Against their will is the absolute best way.

    I probably shouldn't put that down in writing.

    The whole 'admissible evidence' thing.

  2. I miss those sweet and innocent days.

  3. Travis you are such a pig...but I love you anyway!

    Here is my story from long ago...

    Thanks for letting me play

  4. I totally should have done that to the first guy who pulled a similar thing on me.

    But, I'm too nice to hit ;)

  5. DItto to Big Sis!

    My Memoir Monday is being drafted now. I am a slacker, but will be linking up later this afternoon....


  6. The ole Bait&Switch or Bob&Weave kiss stealing trick.


    Gotta work on your exit time. Can't linger too long.

  7. You were dead sexy! And I saw your hand brushing that little chickie's arm in the pic. Subtle. You were a smoothe operator back then...

    Lingering lips will get you everytime.

  8. I have to say I'm impressed with her gumption - not too many freshman girls would have clocked a BMOC senior basketball stud like you, Big T. But I completely understand why you'll never apologize for stealing the kiss. Sometimes a slap upside the head is just the price of doin' bizness. Great story!

  9. Buah ha ha! So you were THAT guy in high school . . . LoL! :)

  10. Just another case of violence in our public schools. Someone should really do something about that.

  11. This story really really really makes me want to slap someone.Now I'm gonna have to hit the bars tonight Travis, thanks!

  12. Oh you SO deserved that slap. I would have kicked your ass.

  13. Boy you are ballsy ain't ya Travis.. You sports guys think we should all just swoon at your greatness ahem NOT.. Lol j/k HEre is my link hun

  14. I is here!

    And I don't think you deserved the slap. Hell, what was she, stupid? Of course you were going to make a move!

  15. She kept going into the gym week after week. Just sayin.

  16. Ahhh she knew it was coming. She just didn't wanna look like ho bag in front of everyone else. You, meanwhile, still managed to look cool. Right?

  17. Mine is finally up. sorry so late:

    Mazzio's? As in the PIZZA place? There was one in Jackson and it was my FAVE! YUM!

    Love this tale. And the flaming basketball. My 2 younger brothers are both bball players.

    Can't believe she slapped you! She coulda just backed away--meanie!

  18. 'Twas probably the leprechaun hiding under the rainbow that scared her off!

  19. I never had the balls to slap anyone. Of course no one ever tried to kiss me in high school... except for the exchange student but I don't think it counts when they're from Venezuela.

    I should probably slap someone at least once in my life. Sounds very cleansing.

  20. I'm thinking you should've shown her your flaming balls.....

  21. i've slapped a few faces in my day -- but never as quite as memorable as this. awesome tale.. i love it -- but look on the bright side -- you wouldn't change it-- and she i bet, wouldn't either. your lives went the way they were surely supposed to -- and they also came out for the better-- i'm sure.

    happy -- "Tuesday'

    sorry i'm late-

  22. I like your hot ginge pictures, yo. That class ring pose, looks like Ginger Steel to me.

  23. PS - not that you got slapped. But the stories they produce. Just to clarify. Don't hate your new follower.

  24. I would like to hear about the other time you got slapped. Love this!

  25. lol!

    you remind me of a guy that did that to me when I was in 9th grade. he held me real tight and would not let go. I had to grab his nuts and squeeze tight, and he quickly jumped away.


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